“You are an old soul.” A Hindu High Priest told me about 15 years ago. He was a visiting professor for a course which I was doing with the University of the West Indies and we had several long conversations about our earthly journey, past lives and karma. “You are a 30-year-old, in the body of an 80-year-old – you have walked this earth many times.”
Before he said it so profoundly, I think that I had already figured it out through a series of coincidences with people and books. Being an old soul has nothing to do one’s age in this incarnation – old souls seem to bring with them a sense of spiritual wisdom through learning processes of previous incarnations. As a child, I drew conclusions about things which I could not have possibly known about yet in this physical world. One of those moments occurred at my grandmother’s death when I was about 8 years old. The family and other people were sad and cried way into the night after her death. I remember wondering why they acted this way because I knew that my grandmother had crossed over to another life and it was not the end of her. Just think of the confusion I would have caused if I said, “Don’t cry for her… her soul has only crossed over to another lifetime!”
Two of my favorite authors on past lives are Brian Weiss and Deepak Chopra. Their work and research resonates deeply with me and provides an explanation of what I cannot explain logically. In this current lifetime, one of my struggles was understanding the complex dynamics of the relationship between my husband and myself and the constant feeling of being “suffocated” in the relationship, whether we were having any problems. I remember that twinkle in his eyes on the first day that I met him and the feeling that I knew him already. One thing led to another until we got married then separated several years later. We are both good people and had good intentions for our lives together but somehow I could never settle fully in the relationship. Many years after our separation, I did a past life reading out of curiosity as some things did not make logical sense to me. As the reader channeled one of our past lives to me, some pieces of the puzzle fell into place. We had a karmic past together and that energy from our previous lifetime was still present at our soul energy fields (which explains the reason for feeling suffocated, whether he was doing anything to create this feeling).
In that past life, he was an aristocrat and I was the obedient, submissive wife who stayed at home and cared for the household. He had money, power and control and we were very wealthy. However, the money was not important to me. I gave it all away. I longed to have my voice be heard. I was an intelligent woman who had ideas to create things and advance education but could not do so in that particular era. As part of the evolution of our own souls, we chose to come back together, share another lifetime and to butt heads about my need to have my voice be heard and his need to control me. Within our marriage (before knowing any of this) my voice felt constantly choked and looking back now, I can see how we both operated from fear. His fear of losing me. My fear of not letting him control me. His fear of me being “out there” doing what I needed to do. My fear of feeling that if I did not respond to my calling in this lifetime, I would let my soul down terribly. Even when he said “You can do everything you want to do”, that feeling of suffocation would not go away.
The reader doing my past life reading told me that in this lifetime, I would meet lots of people from my previous lifetime whom I had helped. They would be everywhere in this lifetime waiting for me, which really explains why I think I meet so many people whom I seem to recognize from a soul level. (This is another blog.) I have met some phenomenal people, in all kinds of unusual circumstances, who have blessed my life in all kinds of ways. Maybe they don’t even quite understand it themselves but because of this past life reading, I do and it is all awesome!!! By choosing to explore beyond the normal, life has graciously supported me and given me the confidence that when we chose to live from our highest self and our highest truth, the universe provides all that we need to fulfill our soul mission.
This awareness of my past life with my husband created a shift in me from blaming him and myself to being more compassionate towards both of us. It helped me understand and embrace myself and the need to fulfill my soul mission in this lifetime, even though it meant making really tough decisions. Choosing to let go of the relationship, even though the stakes were high and it was a painful transition with huge life changes, freed my soul in a powerful way. One can argue (and I am sure that he will have a counter argument to mine) that letting go of each other resulted in quite a lot of chaos and discord but looking back now after several years, I can see how sometimes it is necessary for all things to fall apart before you can rebuild yourself from the inside again. That internal growth is the gift to the evolution of our souls towards becoming a lighter spirit. (By the way, if I knew how much pain this separation would have caused to my entire family, I would have probably avoided the pain and remained feeling suffocated – anyone reading this and who have gone through a divorce or separation or major life crisis would understand what I mean. :))
The influence of past lives in our current lives are not only limited to lovers and our intimate relationships. Past life readings have helped people heal major illnesses, fears, emotional upheaval in their lives which stemmed from things which happened in previous lifetimes. Some of the people who share karmic past lives with us, show up in our work places, in our social activities and within our families as well. Some come to us in very challenging ways and others bring light and love in our lives. If you take the time to explore, you will be surprised at what you will find!!! All of this sounds unrealistic but there is growing evidence of those karmic ties that explains what cannot be explained in a logical manner. In our search for answers, it is one more option.
But the greatest thing I have learnt in all of this, is that love conquers all. Whatever decisions we make, whatever new paths we journey towards, whatever mission we set to accomplish… do it out of love. Love for yourself to free your own spirit… everything else will click into place.
Not everyone believes in past lives. (It has taken quite a bit of courage to write this blog and I cringe just to think that some of the people who are regular readers are probably thinking I have gone off the deep end now. Don’t worry – I am still Magdalene – it is all good!!!) As I write about my soul journey, I realize how vulnerable it makes me but I also believe that it is only by sharing that we can grow as we are all such unique spirits. I have also grown on my journey because others have been vulnerable to share as well. I have great respect for the people who have ventured into this field of work looking at past lives and practice it authentically, ethically and respectfully even though have been highly criticized by sceptics. One of my own conclusions after many years of trying to put logical explanations to various events and circumstances in my own life, is that there is more to our current life than what meets the eye. A past life reading may be able to help you gain a new or different perspective that may simply help you be more compassionate towards yourself and others. When you know better, you do better. When you understand, you forgive yourself and forgive others.
Here is a link to an interview with Dr. Brian Weiss.